Scholastic Secondary: Year 12 Formals

So I promised in one of my previous posts that I would cover some general tips on the Year 12 Formal. This is typically done either on its own, or in conjunction with another school (if your child's school is single-sex or has a low number of Year 12 students).

I'll try and keep my tips fairly broad and general based on a combination of my own experiences, other tips I've heard from family and friends over the years, stuff I've read in various magazines and stuff I've found on the Internet.

Ladies Formalwear:

The Dress:

• If you are choosing a dress, I would very much aim for a dress that you WILL wear in the future. When you are choosing your dress, think about what other events you'll wear it to in the future or if it can be altered after the formal to account for this. Ball gowns are probably not the wisest choice for exactly this reason. 
• If you are large-busted (anything above a D-cup), you will need a bra. Pony up for a strapless bra if your bra straps will be showing-Bras n Things do sell some convertible bras in larger cup sizes. Think of this as a long-term investment too, as this also enables a wider variety of clothing to be worn. 
• If your dress is low-cut, there are a variety of options available to address this. A U-bra is basically a bra where the space between the cups is cut much lower so it's otherwise invisible underneath clothing. Plunge bras are another option and serve a similar purpose (albeit at the cost of pushing the breasts together and thus giving very epic cleavage). A third option is to purchase (or even sew on) a "modesty footer". These are small pieces of fabric with straps that attach to your bra and give the illusion of a singlet or tank top worn underneath (if the footer matches the top, it just changes the neckline). These are available at some lingerie stores or online. 
• In terms of length, while the traditional choice is floor-or-maxi length, a knee-length option is also an acceptable choice, provided the dress is otherwise tasteful and appropriate for the event. Wearing your favourite tight-fitting bodycon gown is probably not an appropriate choice.
• Above all, remember these key simple points: make sure you can move in it (and by that I also mean getting in and out of cars, seats, toilets and so on), make sure that you are being modest while wearing it (that is, if you sit down you aren't flashing half of your classmates) and that it's comfortable. 

The Coverup:

• Some (although not all) ladies will opt for a shawl or coverup for either all or part of the evening. If you do opt for one, make sure that you keep it where you are sitting all night. If it's a sleeved one, make sure that the sleeves don't catch on things (i.e hair, jewellery, tableware). 
• Also make sure that it fits with the theme for the evening-a bright pink button-up cardigan will get some odd looks. Boleros are a good choice and can be easily popped into your handbag. 

The Shoes:

• The rule about "you will use this again" also applies here: if you are not likely to wear those shoes in the future, don't buy them! 
• If you do not normally wear a stiletto heel, practice, practice, practice. Wear them around the house (for short periods) while doing chores or even studying. Your feet will thank you later. 
• Regardless of whether you do or don't wear stiletto heels, make sure that you road test at least twice before the evening-wear them around the house (for short periods) or if you're attending a party before the formal, wear them then. Why twice? Once is good for blisters, twice will take into account any changes between now and then. 
• If you are not comfortable with a stiletto heel (or do not feel like you will wear them in future), a low heel is a classic and comfortable option. These are also more likely to see you through your years beyond high school. The same rules above about wearing heels apply. 
• One tip: if you are sliding out of your shoes for whatever reason, use some hairspray to stick them in place. If you're wearing stockings (or not comfortable with using hairspray on your feet), try and get some stockings with sole grips or stock up on shoe inserts. Stuffing your shoes can also help if they're close-toe ones. 
• Regardless of how high the heel is, it is also recommended to purchase a pair of "emergency flats" and keep them in your handbag. They're foldable ballet flats that are designed to be worn after a long night and will work wonders if your feet are sore from standing/walking in heels all night. 

Accessories and Primping:

• The rule with all accessories is keep 'em tasteful and subtle. They're meant to accessorise, not take over the outfit. 
• For earrings, necklaces and bracelets, try and refrain from big, heavy, chunky items. There are two reasons for this: 1) the risk of them catching on various objects or people (especially while dancing) and 2) it also looks extremely tacky. It is possible to get "large" necklaces without them being a hazard. 
• For hairstyles, if you are getting it done professionally, stop washing your hair a day or two before going in-it's easier to work with if it's a little "dirty." If you are using any pins or slides, give them to the hairdresser to add in as well for that nice touch. 
• For makeup, a good way to ensure that you get a nice look and also can touch it up throughout the night, try and visit any sort of cosmetics counter which allows you to redeem the cost of a makeover on their products. (Napoleon Perdis is a great example of this) The cost is usually kept fairly affordable as well (i.e. $60 is enough to get a touchup of eyeshadow, mascara, lipstick and so on) Try to avoid anything excessively cakey or more suited for a nightclub. 
• A small handbag or clutch is a suitable choice for the evening. Make sure that you remember where you have put it (if you're concerned about security, hiding it under a jacket is a good option) and keep the load small. (ticket, money for a taxi if you need it, mints, purse, mobile, house keys, some bandaids, hollywood tape and a pair of foldable flats are really all you need)

Male Formalwear:

• There are a wide variety of formal hire places out there, however I would advise against this if you do not already own a suit, or you need to somehow modify the suit (i.e. to accommodate a cast). depending on when you hire out the suit, things can change between now and then too. In addition, that same suit will potentially serve you well beyond high school. 
• If you're concerned about cost, look out for deals at reasonably priced department stores: Myer and David Jones both have some great options at reasonable prices. They may also even provide the option of doing a combined package (which may include a shirt, suit jacket, pants and a matching tie/hanky). 
• At the most for the evening, the only items you will need to wear are a shirt, tie, tie clip, pants, suit jacket, socks and shoes. A waistcoat is a nice touch if you wish, but be prepared for people to call you "waiter." As tempting as it may be, cummerbunds are not necessary, dickies are an absolute no-no (if you're unsure of what a dickie is, it's the false shirt-front that is commonly seen on the likes of Looney Tunes where it flips up) and I would heavily avoid bow ties for the same reason of being called "waiter." (or 'garcon' if you're somewhere really posh) 
• If you are taking a partner and wish to match your tie to their dress (or suit if you are so inclined), take a swatch of the material along when you are picking out your suit/tie (try and get the hem or if the dress has a extra bow or ribbon, take a piece from there). If you can't get hold of a swatch, your phone may be a viable substitute provided the screen is as bright as possible when you are picking out the tie. 
• Some people may struggle with tying a tie, particularly if it's not part of your school uniform or you use a pre-tied tie in your school uniform. If this is the case, pre-tied ties come in a wide variety of colours and patterns-make sure that the colour and pattern are suitable.
• To get the most out of your suit, it is strongly suggested that you pick a plain coloured suit and refrain from any patterns. 
• For shoes, please pony up for dress shoes-a simple black or brown pair are best. Refrain from any pointy shoes or anything really informal-sneakers with the formal suit are not a good look. Again, make sure that you road test them by wearing them around the house. 
• on the night, all you really need are your ticket, wallet, breath mints, phone, house keys, money for a taxi and bandaids! 

Taking a Date:

• This is not a requirement of the evening, so keep this in mind.
• If you wish to bring a partner from outside the school, ask first. Most schools will indicate somewhere on their ticket order form if outside partners are allowed or not. If they are (and especially if they're over 18), you may be asked to provide a few references. Do NOT put down your name or your parent's names if this is the case. Also put down your partner's contact number-the school may wish to contact them directly. (Also try and be appropriate with this one-taking your mum or dad to the formal is not cool) 
• If the outside partner is of the same gender as you (that is recognised gender, not biological gender i.e. you both identify as female), you may encounter a little more trouble. Be prepared to take your case to the principal if necessary or to go further if needed. Under many state discrimination laws, it is illegal to make separate rules for students who are LGBT. 
• And finally, if you are taking a partner from inside the school, choose wisely-whether you like it or not, you will become the subject of gossip. 

Hiring that limo:

It is often the highlight of the evening to hire a limo or similar and travel through the streets feeling all swanky and glamorous. As many formals are now shifting to hotel ballrooms and the like, having a limo serves more of a sense of fun rather than any actual desire to wow everybody. 

• First off, find out who does want to be in your limo for the evening. This will result in the overall cost being split amongst the lot of you. This also includes partners from outside the school. Most limos can take up to 10 guests, although 7-8 is a reasonable number.
• Do your research-visit websites, compare deals and get the reviews from others. Word of mouth is a great way to do this if there are any "Year 13" students at your school. 
• Try and aim for websites where the full cost is spelled out clearly. The fee will either be a flat fee or a fee per hour. If anyone is charging fees per kilometre or fee based on distance, avoid these. 
• Avoid companies where the only option is to pay the full cost upon booking. At the very least, the option should be to pay a deposit on booking (no mroe than 50%) and then pay off the rest at least a few days before the event. Other options may also include paying after the event. This will protect you from a scam. 
• Do NOT try and cheat the bookings to claim that you are over 18 or that your friends are. There is a reason for this which I will explain later. 
• The best way to split the cost is evenly among everyone. Yes, this includes outside partners. 
• If you or your parents are concerned about being ripped off or mistreated, place the booking under the parents name and check in with them regularly. 
• To keep costs down, have everyone meet at the closest participant's house to the formal location that you can. It also saves the driver time picking up multiple pickups on the way. 
• And finally, limos are really only good for travelling one-way. Don't go for the return trip-you'll likely be picked up by family/friends first or if someone needs to go home early (including you), you may wind up being the only one in the limo on th way home. It's also more expensive. 

General Formal Reminders:

• Do NOT, under any circumstances, drink alcohol before the event. (Or during for that matter) You may think that I'm being a party pooper, but many schools have instituted a flat ban on alcohol for school formals due to the number of students being underage at the time, the risk that someone under 18 will get alcohol and the fact that it is a school event. If teachers do get a whiff of alcohol on you, it's bye-bye formal evening and no refund. On top of that, many limo companies will charge an extra fee if you are found to be trashing the limo, puke in the limo (or urinate) or will refuse service if you are found to be intoxicated. This also extends to the champagne in the limo-this is why you should not cheat the booking system to claim you are over 18. Save it for the after-party. 
• If you have an allergy or genuine dietary need (that is a medical need), inform the school well in advance. Most schools will have this information on record already if it's a chronic issue or an allergy, but if it's a slightly more recent venture (and can be backed up with a medical letter from the GP/specialist), you may need to inform them. If your partner has an allergy or dietary need and does not attend the school, make sure you inform them in advance too. 
• If your dietary need is a religious one, many schools will offer choices to allow for this. If they don't, raise the issue (politely). Most schools will keep things simple by having the meat offers as beef, chicken or lamb to also avoid this. 
• If you are genuinely vegetarian or vegan, also informing the school well in advance will endear you. Suddenly turning vegan/vegetarian to get special meals on the night of the formal will not endear you to anyone. Most schools will also allow for the choice of the vegetarian meal as a backup. 
• For everyone else, you'll need to suck up that diet for ONE night. Aim for the closest thing that will suit your diet if you absolutely must, but the school does not have the time or resources to cater for the soup diet, detox diet, cabbage diet, atkins diet, macrobiotic diet, zone diet or gulping down Fatblaster in addition to catering for allergies, medical or religious reasons. 
• If you're taking a camera, make sure that the batteries are fresh (if it uses AA's or AAA's) or fully charged (if it uses a battery pack) for the night and you have enough space on your memory card. If the school is offering professional formal photos, don't be a dick and take pictures next to the actual cameraman! He's getting paid to be there, you on the other hand, are not. 
• Finally, if you are not inclined to take Year 12 seriously, please reconsider whether it's worth wasting that year (and disrupting others) simply to blow $2000+ on an evening that you will likely forget ten years out of high school. 
• Most importantly, HAVE FUN!